Stephanie Everett

Share your military spouse story:
I am a National Guard spouse who is connected to my community in a very non-traditional way. I met my spouse in 2003; a time where wars were the norm and patriotism was unrivaled. We met, married, and had our first son before we were of "legal age." And that's OK! In my journey as a military spouse over the years, the one thing that has resonated with me is community and connection are important to growth and collaboration. From the very early days of joining the FRG, to the recent years of connecting with other spouses in an online community, I have learned first-hand how vital it is to adapt to the ever-changing ideas of what it looks like to have support and belong in this community. As a spouse who is disconnected from the traditions of a SFRG, it became difficult for me to connect and build support outside of that. I am someone who is willing to let go of the traditions and pave the way to create new approaches to meeting those needs for connecting with each other.

Describe any leadership positions or provide an overview of your leadership contributions within the military community.
As a spouse who has taken on various leadership roles and responsibilities within the National Guard community over the last 22 years, I have found that there is not a “one size fits all” approach to receiving and providing support in this community. Early on in my spouse’s career, I was part of the SFRG and served in various roles as a volunteer, co-chair, and secretary. As the co-chair and secretary, I helped to plan and establish a few of the first SFRG events for a brand new National Guard Battery. Later on, I realized the value of adaptability in providing the support that military spouses need. I joined an online military spouse community and became a mentor to National Guard spouses. As my leadership has developed within this community of spouses, I have said yes to being more involved in other roles in the staff. Currently, I am the Deployment and Reintegration Advocate for Military Spouse Advocacy Network.

What programs or projects are you currently involved in that support the needs of military families?
In my role as Deployment and Reintegration Advocate with MSAN, I help empower military spouses and families by connecting them with the resources and support they need as they navigate deployments and reintegration after deployments. In this role, I offer guidance and support through webinars, chats, content and blog writing, and have developed a one of a kind “Military Family Deployment Toolkit” that is currently being piloted and shared with spouses and families. It has been my privilege over the last 6 years of volunteering over 2500 hours to provide peer to peer mentorship to over 30 spouses. As an advocate, I help empower even more spouses by giving them a voice in a community who truly listens and supports them.

What moments best reflect your impact on building inclusive community among military spouses?
Members of the National Guard and their families face unique deployment challenges. As a National Guard Spouse who has experienced multiple short and long-term deployments, my experience has been that unless you are connected with the SFRG or other National Guard sponsored programs, it is difficult to find the needed resources and support. As a spouse not wholly connected in the traditional ways, I know the impact and importance of having resources and connections readily available. When I created the Military Family Deployment Toolkit, I developed it with National Guard families in mind. This toolkit is fully inclusive for all branches, and has additional tips, tools, and resources specifically for National Guard families. This toolkit is currently being “piloted” and shared with military spouses in the Mentorship HUB, as well as with National Guard Family Programs and the Yellow Ribbon Program in my home state and others.

Identify your main advocacy effort and describe your personal connection to the cause.
We can’t forget that National Guard Spouses are also part of this sacrifice to support the mission of the military. As a spouse who found connection to her community- despite being disconnected from her community- I hope to advocate that it is OK to build your own community in non-traditional ways. National Guard spouses need deployment support in unique ways from their peers. There is not a “one size fits all” approach. Spouses still need each other, they need to hear real stories, and feel the validation that they are not alone in the difficult seasons of life. I am someone willing to let go of the traditions and help pave the way to creating new approaches to meeting those needs for connecting with each other. Creating and sharing the deployment toolkit has already helped connect National Guard families across the States with resources they need. I hope to have this toolkit reach all 50 states and other places around the globe!

Summarize your advocacy outreach strategies, including any events, media involvement, or other communication efforts.
As a military spouse advocate, I work closely with military spouses to share helpful deployment and reintegration resources. I focus on building genuine connections and meeting spouses where they are, using social media, websites, email, and a private online community that reaches about 3,000 military spouses. I’m also actively connected with other National Guard community organizations in my state, including the Yellow Ribbon Program, and enjoy supporting National Guard families at local events. My passion is creating welcoming spaces, strengthening community, and making sure military spouses and families feel informed, supported, and never alone—especially during deployments and reintegration.

What do you hope to accomplish with the AFI Military Spouse of the Year^® title?
With the AFI Military Spouse of the Year® title, I hope to build bridges among the National Guard communities, and help connect more National Guard spouses and families, especially those who may not be connected with their own communities, with deployment and reintegration support. I hope to inspire more spouses to cultivate their own communities in ways that empower them to connect and be connected with others just like them.