Merrianne Nissly

Share your military spouse story:
I never wanted to be a military spouse. We broke up when my boyfriend said he was joining the Marines. I pictured a life of loneliness, yet watching him stand at Parris Island, I knew he was my person. So I married my high school sweetheart and chose the life I honestly thought would break me. Fourteen years later, he flies over those same Yellow Footprints as a pilot. The life I feared has brought me so much joy. It has forced me to do hard things. I realized I had to walk into rooms full of strangers and go-first, even when it was uncomfortable. To share my story vulnerably, even when my voice shook. Our stories are the start of belonging. The moment we choose to 'go first,' we unlock the door for someone else to step in. Move after move, this vulnerability transforms strangers into chosen family. I almost let fear steal this life from me, never suspecting that the very journey I resisted effectively held the purpose I needed. I am now grateful to be a military spouse!

Describe any leadership positions or provide an overview of your leadership contributions within the military community.
2023–2025 (NAS Meridian): Expanded Sisterhood to include generational mentorship. Brought in seasoned Reserve and Veteran spouses alongside new active duty spouses to continue building bridges. 2020–2023 (NAS Pensacola): Founded "Sisterhood" to fill a community gap; designed weekly programming to foster deep intentional community. 2020 (Quantico): Spearheaded the revival of dormant Spouse Coffees at The Basic School; hosted weekly events to re-engage isolated families. 2016–2020 (Tampa): Mentored NROTC families, serving as a bridge between university life and the fleet. 2014–2016 (RS Kansas City): Stood up the Family Readiness program from scratch; spearheaded a district-wide Family Day at Arrowhead Stadium. 2013 (Camp Lejeune): Served as Command Team Advisor for 2D Maintenance Bn, orchestrating homecomings, advising leadership on family initiatives and events.

What programs or projects are you currently involved in that support the needs of military families?
2025 – Beaufort, SC -President, Military Spouse Association of Beaufort: Leading organizational strategy across MCAS, MCRD, and the Naval Hospital through advocacy, event coordination, and philanthropic engagement. -Selected for the Association of Defense Communities, Military Spouse Leadership Initiative; currently collaborating with a nationwide cohort on a strategic capstone project, driving solutions for families. -Speaking on spouse engagement quarterly, MCAS Beaufort Installation Family Readiness Council. -Stood up a family-oriented fitness area on base. -Military Spouse Liaison with Beaufort Military Alliance, a collaboration with the regional Chamber of Commerce. Advocating for spouse integration in the local civilian community. -Leading two bi-weekly connection points: Sisterhood (personal development) and the Tri-Command Community Connection (spiritual resilience). Maintaining in town and on base, to encourage location accessibility for spouses at each installation.

What moments best reflect your impact on building inclusive community among military spouses?
When I arrived in Beaufort in January 2025, I faced a unique landscape. There were three installations: MCAS, Parris Island, and the Naval Hospital, separated by invisible fences. Resources were available across the Tri-Command, yet social barriers kept spouses isolated in silos, unsure if they "belonged" down the road. As President of the Military Spouse Association, my mission became building bridges. We shifted our strategy to ensure our space is accessible to every spouse. Crucially, we broadened our mission to welcome Retiree, Veteran, and Reservist spouses, inviting their wisdom to foster intergenerational mentorship. My goal is simple, to help us really see each other on the journey. Today, our events bring these groups together. By dismantling barriers, we didn't just pool resources; we exponentially expanded the safety net. We are proving that whether you are active or retired, Navy or Marine, on this side or that side of town, we all belong to the same community.

Identify your main advocacy effort and describe your personal connection to the cause.
Advocacy Platform: Combating the mental health crisis of isolation by replacing deceptive digital connections with a unified, real-world, healthy, and vulnerable community. Personal Connection: Our community faces a paradox, we are digitally "connected" yet profoundly isolated. Social media is a tool, but it is deceptive, because an online network cannot walk with you through a crisis or bring a casserole when life falls apart. I almost walked away from this life because of the fear of isolation. I've walked through many seasons of this kind of debilitating loneliness. That struggle revealed a critical truth: isolation is a threat to force readiness. I champion a return to deep, unified community, creating pathways for respectful invitation to the leadership table. By teaching and empowering spouses to “go first" and reject silos, we ensure families are ready. The home front is the backbone of national security. When the home front is rooted in community, the mission succeeds.

Summarize your advocacy outreach strategies, including any events, media involvement, or other communication efforts.
I was a featured spouse in the National Geographic documentary Top Guns: The Next Generation (Ep 3), advocating for the reality of pilot families. To combat isolation, I am currently developing "At The Table," a podcast that shares diverse stories and ties into the Sisterhood mentorship platform. Locally, I manage digital communities for over 300 spouses across the Military Spouse Association, Tri-Command Community Connection, and Sisterhood, transforming "updates" into in-person connection points. I communicate in person weekly for Sisterhood and TCCC, teaching resilience and spiritual wellness. I am supporting a seminar that provides spouses with practical tools for personal growth and community-building education. I meet regularly with installation leadership and family readiness employees to align resources. Through my ADC Leadership Cohort, I collaborate monthly on policy solutions and will advocate directly to DOD and Legislative leaders at the ADC National Summit in May.

What do you hope to accomplish with the AFI Military Spouse of the Year^® title?
My goal with the title of Military Spouse of the Year would be to drive a culture shift, moving from viewing spouses as dependents to investing in them as vital assets. Investment in Spouse Development Launch the Military Spouse Leadership Collective, a mentorship program. By offering a "Community Leader Certification" actively invest in spouse development, and validate their unpaid labor with professional tools. Return to Connectedness Through the "At The Table" podcast, I will champion a return to connectedness. My goal is to move the audience from passive consumption to in-person community building, challenging spouses to reject deceptive virtual substitutes for the real village. A Seat at the Table I will advocate for a permanent spouse voice at the community, installation, and DOW levels. By partnering with leaders across these tiers, I will prove that family readiness is synonymous with force lethality, ensuring families are recognized as partners in national security.