Meg Graves

Share your military spouse story:
My Navy journey began at 24 over a plate of hotwings. When Dan walked in, it wasn't just love; it was the feeling of everything falling into place. We were old friends who became more, and at 27, he traded civilian life for a uniform. Since then, our ‘ship’ has sailed from the East Coast to the plains of Nebraska and now to the Pacific Northwest. We’ve filled our life with three children, countless road trip adventures, and even better people. Our story is defined by the waves we’ve weathered. We have navigated deployments and the complexities of raising three children, including two with special needs. Most significantly, we survived my diagnosis of Stage 3C Triple Negative Breast Cancer. Through every treatment and every PCS, we cheered each other on—his career in the Navy and mine in education. Our story proves that even in the ‘cracks of the sidewalk,’ a family can bloom. I am honored to share this story of hope, showing that military families don't just endure—we thrive together.

Describe any leadership positions or provide an overview of your leadership contributions within the military community.
My leadership is defined by 15 years as a Navy spouse & resilience as a cancer survivor. These experiences, alongside raising 3 children, including two Exceptional Family Members (EFM), provide me with insight into the multifaceted challenges of military life and complexities of frequent PCS transitions. Currently, I serve as a volunteer advisory board member for the Military Family Advisory Network (MFAN) and as the Outreach & Volunteer Coordinator for Partners in PROMISE. My leadership extends to systemic policy-making through the DoD Child Collaboration study and the Patient & Family Partnership Council at NHC Oak Harbor. Having served as an ombudsman & key spouse for Navy and joint commands, I possess the executive presence to bridge gaps between families and leadership. I am prepared to lead with grace, fostering a 'Go Purple' culture that ensures every family is seen and supported.

What programs or projects are you currently involved in that support the needs of military families?
For 15 yrs, I have turned my experience as an EFM spouse, mother, and educator into a platform for advocacy. Currently, I serve as a volunteer advisory board member for MFAN, and as the Outreach and Volunteer Coordinator for Partners in PROMISE. My background as an special education educator has been vital in navigating the complexities of special education (EFMP) as we move between states, and I have used that expertise to speak for military families before Congress and key change-makers. My involvement spans the local and the systemic: from coaching spouse kickball and serving as an Ombudsman to preserving our history as the Historian for Naval Services Family Line. Whether I am protecting the archives of the Ombudsman program or advising on DOD patient-centered studies, my goal is to bridge the gap between complex health needs and vital resources. I strive to ensure every military family—especially those in the EFM community—feels seen, heard, and fiercely supported.

What moments best reflect your impact on building inclusive community among military spouses?
I am a firm believer in ‘Going Purple.’ Our struggles do not exist in a vacuum, and I love to advocate across all branches because we are stronger when we share solutions. I want to hear what families are experiencing so I can shine a light on their struggles and successes. Like a flower growing in a city sidewalk crack, I want to help everyone succeed despite their environment. Sometimes, families just need to know someone is in their corner listening. I’ve put this into practice through my involvement with Military Family Advisory Network, Partners in PROMISE, & Naval Services Family Line. From speaking at the Quality of life Roundtable to serving as an ombudsman, I use my experience to bridge gaps in EFM support and healthcare. It is my honor to amplify what I hear from fellow spouses so that change-makers can improve lives for those who come after us. I work to ensure that every military family—across every branch—knows they are not alone and that their voice is being heard.

Identify your main advocacy effort and describe your personal connection to the cause.
My primary advocacy effort is the empowerment of military families navigating complex medical care and special education. My connection to this cause is deeply personal: I am a Stage 3 triple-negative breast cancer survivor and the mother of two AuDHD children. I have lived the reality of 'jumping through hoops' to maintain continuity of care while moving between TRICARE Prime, Select, East, and West. As an educator, I also intimately understand the battle for equitable IEPs and the struggles unique to children with learning differences. These experiences have fueled my work with Partners in PROMISE and the Military Family Advisory Network. I advocate because I know that a medical or educational diagnosis should not be a barrier to a successful military life. It is my mission to ensure that every family—especially those who 'do things differently'—has the resources and support to bloom exactly where they are planted.

Summarize your advocacy outreach strategies, including any events, media involvement, or other communication efforts.
Effective advocacy requires translating personal struggle into systemic solutions. I am a proven communicator, ranging from local classrooms to national stages. I have actively engaged the media to 'shine a light' on the EFM community, ensuring our stories reach those with the power to act. As a published voice, I have authored articles for Partners in PROMISE, breaking down special education hurdles into actionable steps for families. I have led numerous classes on how special education impacts the mobile military family and have briefed leadership on patient-centered initiatives. My high-level experience includes speaking at the 2024 Military Family Caucus in Spokane, WA and speaking to the Quality of Life panel regarding the critical needs of Adult EFMP. These roles have prepared me to communicate complex issues with clarity and empathy. I am ready to serve as a national spokesperson, leveraging both the written word and public forums to support our military community.

What do you hope to accomplish with the AFI Military Spouse of the Year^® title?
It is an honor to be nominated. If awarded the AFI Military Spouse of the Year® title, my goal is to serve as a bridge between the lived experiences of our families and the decision-makers who shape our lives. I will use this platform to shine a light on the intersection of medical resilience and educational advocacy. Having navigated Stage 3 cancer and the complexities of raising AuDHD children, I want to ensure no family feels they must choose between their service and their health. I hope to accomplish 3 things: foster a 'Go Purple' culture where branches share solutions; advocate for EFM support across state lines; and empower spouses to use their voices with grace and humility. We are stronger in numbers, and I aim to be a megaphone for the successes and struggles of our community. I will work to ensure that the changes we fight for today create a more equitable, supportive environment for every military family that follows in our footsteps.