Courtney Nestor

Share your military spouse story:
I have been a military spouse since 2002, spending my first five years as a dual-military service member with multiple deployments. At the time, I did not fully understand how military life affects families—especially children—through constant moves, isolation, limited professional opportunities, and uneven access to resources. Serving myself gave me a service member’s perspective that ultimately strengthened me and helped our family navigate years of service. We have five children and have moved 11 times. Our oldest, now a junior in high school, has attended schools in six states. I have been the consistent caregiver, managing special education advocacy, medical needs, and daily life—often alone. Without strong support systems, military life can feel overwhelming and isolating, and for years it felt like survival rather than stability. Our assignments ranged from isolated Fort Hunter Liggett, to Orlando with no military community, to Fort Bragg with deep military integration. These contrasts showed me what support truly matters. Today we live on Moffett Field in Mountain View, CA—the only DoD housing area without a joint higher headquarters, CYS, MWR, or integrated family programs, despite all branches being represented in the Bay Area. These gaps led me to found Bay Area Military Network, now led by a board of active-duty members, veterans, and a Gold Star spouse—ensuring families don’t face these challenges alone.

Describe any leadership positions or provide an overview of your leadership contributions within the military community.
My leadership in founding the Bay Area Military Network (BAMN) is rooted in a deep understanding of military family life. I have recognized that families succeed not just through resilience, but through access to infrastructure, community, and the correct resources. Living in the Bay Area—without a traditional garrison headquarters, with families in all branches, and facing the highest cost of living in the nation—made the gaps impossible to ignore. Rather than wait for solutions, I chose to build what did not exist. I began by hosting a bike and coffee gathering in front of my home; more than 25 families attended, many connecting with other military families for the first time. That moment confirmed the need for an organized response, and within a month, I founded the non-profit. I support more than 250 families and partner with over ten organizations. I lead day-to-day operations, partnerships, and direct family support—ensuring families are connected, supported, and not alone.

What programs or projects are you currently involved in that support the needs of military families?
I lead and support programs designed to meet the needs of military families living in the Bay Area, where traditional installation support does not exist. I host monthly parent–child playtime meetups, monthly S’mores Nights, and Snacks and Sports Sundays, in partnership with the USO and VFW, providing snacks and casual recreational opportunities that bring families together and reduce isolation. BAMN also leads school advocacy initiatives, including hosting the first-ever Month of the Military Child celebration at the local elementary school. In addition, the first official Month of the Military Child. To support family readiness and offset the region’s high cost of living, BAMN hosted a Back-to-School Party that provided backpacks, school supplies, and games for military children. Together, these initiatives strengthen community, improve quality of life, and ensure military families in the Bay Area are connected, supported, and not navigating service alone.

What moments best reflect your impact on building inclusive community among military spouses?
The first moment was hosting the first-ever Military Spouse Appreciation Dinner in my backyard. This grassroots gathering brought together spouses from multiple branches who had never before been formally recognized or given a local space to connect. For many, it was the first time they felt seen and acknowledged as military spouses in a region where families are often dispersed and overlooked. The second was organizing a last-minute holiday ornament exchange. Despite the invitation going out only a week in advance, more than 40 spouses attended. The strong turnout highlighted the deep need for connection and belonging. The final moment occurred while I was visiting family on the East Coast. I received a message from a spouse who said, “I’ve lived here for four years and never felt a sense of community. Now something feels different—it’s like new life has been brought here.” That message reaffirmed the impact of this work and strengthened my commitment to continue.

Identify your main advocacy effort and describe your personal connection to the cause.
Community connection is central because I have lived the consequences of its absence. I have served at duty stations with strong military infrastructure and at others with none. I have seen how isolation—especially for spouses and families—magnifies stress, complicates access to resources, and undermines family readiness. In places like the Bay Area, where military families lack a traditional garrison and typical military infrastructure and face an extreme cost of living, the absence of connection can leave families feeling invisible and unsupported. Connection matters to me because it transforms survival into stability. When families are connected, they share information, advocate together, and build trust that no single program can replicate. For me, connection is not a social extra—it's the foundation that enables resource access, resilience, and quality of life. Building community ensures families are seen, supported, and empowered to navigate challenges together rather than alone

Summarize your advocacy outreach strategies, including any events, media involvement, or other communication efforts.
I truely belive connection grows stronger as our military network grows stronger. I have worked to share our story with local organizations, civic partners, sports organizations, and community leaders. I have partnered with the Gary Sinise Foundation – Brothers After War, to bring together our veteran spouses and active duty spouses to help them cope with the challenges of deployments. We have met with local Veteran Resource Organizations at local businesses to tell the story of the challenges of spouses gaining employment, to childcare struggles, to cost of living. BAMN also maintains consistent outreach through a monthly newsletter, active social media communication, and meetings with civic organizations to raise awareness and ensure local leaders understand the unique needs of military families

What do you hope to accomplish with the AFI Military Spouse of the Year^® title?
If selected, I hope to utilize the platform to raise awareness about the unique challenges faced by families stationed in non-traditional, high-cost locations, such as the Bay Area. Our community lives in a privatized housing area without a unified installation or garrison-style command, which often means the needs of active-duty families go unseen or misunderstood at higher levels. I aim to raise awareness that active-duty military spouses and families are living and serving here while navigating the highest cost-of-living county in the nation—often without the infrastructure, childcare options, or employment pathways typically available on larger installations. These gaps directly impact family readiness and quality of life. Through awareness and advocacy, I hope to help break down barriers to spouse employment, highlight the need for affordable childcare, and encourage more informed support models for families serving in geographically dispersed duty locations.