Ashley Tibbetts

Share your military spouse story:
Before becoming a military spouse, I had barely lived outside of New England and was unprepared for how quickly my life would change. In 2010, I left home to build a future with my partner, and within months was preparing for an overseas move to Okinawa — far from everything familiar. Without my usual support system, I struggled to know how to connect or where I belonged. For years, I lived quietly on the outskirts of military life, unsure how to step in or ask for help. It wasn’t until a later assignment, living on base during COVID, that I saw how intentional community forms — through proximity, consistency, and a willingness to show up for one another. When my family returned to Offutt in 2022, I made a conscious decision to do things differently. My story is not one of natural confidence or loud leadership, but of choosing, again and again, to create spaces where others don’t have to feel as alone as I once did.

Describe any leadership positions or provide an overview of your leadership contributions within the military community.
My leadership within the military spouse community has been grounded in service rather than visibility. I currently serve as Vice President of the Offutt Enlisted Spouses Club, after previously serving as Publicity Chair. In these roles, I focus on behind-the-scenes work that keeps organizations accessible, functional, and welcoming. I regularly volunteer across club initiatives, including Winter Wonderland, the Craft Bazaar, and fundraising efforts such as coordinating fireworks and bake sales. I have also supported smaller, relationship-driven efforts, like organizing monthly playgroups and informal networks that help spouses connect without pressure. I am also in my third year on the Spouses Dining-In committee, creating social events where spouses can let loose and build connections across ranks and backgrounds. My leadership style centers on inclusion, consistency, and making community feel approachable, especially for those who may not see themselves as traditional leaders.

What programs or projects are you currently involved in that support the needs of military families?
Much of my current involvement focuses on creating accessible opportunities for connection among military families. In my current role with the Offutt Enlisted Spouses Club, I also plan and execute social events that make connection easier for spouses, including group dinners, activity-based outings, and seasonal events. Recently, I coordinated the club’s annual member appreciation event, creating a welcoming space that celebrated and connected members. These efforts are intentionally designed to lower barriers to participation and help spouses engage at whatever level feels comfortable to them. I have also supported joint officer–enlisted spouse events and represented the Spouses Club at base newcomer and mission-orientation events, serving as a visible point of contact and sharing information about available resources. Across all of my involvement, my focus remains on reducing isolation and helping military families feel welcomed and supported.

What moments best reflect your impact on building inclusive community among military spouses?
One of the moments I am most proud of came during Spouses Dining-In, when I had the opportunity to present the Spirit award to the Offutt Enlisted Spouses Club. As the club gathered on the dance floor, I was struck by the size and breadth of the group—so large it filled multiple tables—made up of spouses spanning generations, backgrounds, personalities, and life experiences. Standing there, I wasn’t thinking about a single event or initiative, but about how many people had chosen to stay, return, and belong. Many of these spouses would not describe themselves as leaders or extroverts, yet they showed up because the space felt accessible and welcoming. Seeing the club recognized in that moment affirmed what inclusive community looks like to me: not uniformity, but connection; not pressure, but presence.

Identify your main advocacy effort and describe your personal connection to the cause.
For years, I waited for a sense of military community to find me. I assumed that belonging would happen naturally with time, but I eventually realized that connection rarely comes on its own. Someone has to take the first step—and that step can feel daunting if you don’t know where you fit or how you’ll be received. My advocacy is rooted in making that first step easier. I focus on building spaces where showing up doesn’t require confidence, experience, or a specific personality. Community works best when people are allowed to enter gradually, without pressure to perform, commit, or immediately belong. I care deeply about creating environments where spouses feel comfortable trying—whether that means attending once, observing quietly, or slowly finding their place over time. When the barrier to entry is low, more people are willing to step forward, and that is where meaningful connection begins.

Summarize your advocacy outreach strategies, including any events, media involvement, or other communication efforts.
Much of my advocacy work happens through behind-the-scenes communication. I use writing, graphic design, and social media to help spouses understand what opportunities exist and what participation actually looks like, so they can decide for themselves whether and how to engage. I do this work through both the Offutt Enlisted Spouses Club and Spouses Dining-In, focusing on clarity, tone, and approachability rather than promotion. I also represent the OESC at base touchpoints such as Newcomer Orientation, the 55th Wing Spouses’ Brief, and community events like the Skills Fair. In these spaces, my role is to maintain a visible, welcoming presence and ensure information is available to spouses as they arrive and get oriented. Across all of my outreach, my goal is simple: to reduce uncertainty and make taking a first step feel easier, whether that step happens immediately or later.

What do you hope to accomplish with the AFI Military Spouse of the Year^® title?
If given the opportunity to serve as AFI Military Spouse of the Year®, I would use the platform to broaden how leadership and participation are understood within the military spouse community. Too often, visibility and confidence are mistaken for impact, leaving many spouses unsure whether they belong or have something to offer. I hope to elevate the idea that leadership can be quiet, relational, and less performative, because meaningful contribution does not require a specific personality or path. By sharing examples of accessible community-building and low-pressure engagement, I want spouses to see that showing up in small ways matters. More than recognition, this title would allow me to validate spouses who feel overlooked or uncertain, and to reinforce that connection, service, and leadership take many forms. My goal is to ensure more spouses recognize their value, feel invited to participate, and understand that they belong—exactly as they are.