Tene Linzey

Share your military spouse story:
I am late to this game. I had plans. I had contingency plans! Not one of them included packing up my family every few years and moving to unfamiliar locations to be a single parent for months on end, but sometimes life takes you in directions you never anticipated. My military spouse journey began with my spouse of 7 years realizing a call to chaplaincy. We had been pastors for years and had a second child on the way. So, the prospect of committing to this lifestyle was an adjustment. But I am an adventurer at heart and love discovering new places, cultures, and food! He served as an Army Reserve Chaplain for a number of years before the call to active duty became undeniable. So, with 3 kids in tow, we transferred and began this journey with active-duty Navy chaplaincy. Prior to becoming a military spouse, I was a high-school teacher when I developed some chronic health conditions which affected my ability to work full time. As the years have gone on, and our 3 children arrived, we have navigated multiple Autism and ADHD diagnoses. As a multiple-member EFMP family, navigating the changes and stressors of military life has been challenging. Challenges can feel overwhelming, and you wonder if the sacrifice of stability and consistent community is worth it. The loss of “needle-in-a-haystack I can’t believe I found you” friends. The uncertainty in finding new specialists at each duty station, making sure continuation of care doesn’t leave holes in the progress that was being made in the previous place. It is often frustrating. It is sometimes disheartening. It is always exhausting. Over the last 15 years I have learned that we must hold on to the possibility that there is something equally amazing at the next place waiting to be discovered. The challenges that exemplify the active-duty military lifestyle can be growth opportunities. If we don’t make the journey with observant eyes and a willingness to do the work, we might miss the things that are in store for us.

Share an example of your leadership experience within the military community:
I believe if you notice that something needs to be improved, you are now part of the solution. Make a phone call. Send an email. Reach out to a decision maker. Everyone has the potential to be a changemaker. After moving to Camp Lejeune, I noticed there were several housing and safety issues consistently coming up as areas of concern for the residents. I knew there had to be a better way to make lasting change for the community. So, I applied to advocate for my community on the Resident Advisory Board. Over the years we have been able to make lasting changes that positively affect the health and safety of our families. We put in user-activated flashing crosswalk signs for our children walking to school. We pushed for tree surveys that identified dead trees that needed removal. We highlighted homes with environmental issues that required escalated attention. While all of our concerns are not fixed magic wand style, everyday residents experience improvements resulting from the RAB.

Describe your involvement in the military community:
I have volunteered for several organizations that work with Marines, Sailors, and Families. For the past 3 years I have volunteered with the Camp Lejeune Leadership Seminar, serving on the Board this year to train and empower military spouses to step into leadership roles in their community. This is my 2nd year as president, 4th year total, as a member of the School Board, advocating for the most enriching experience possible for our military kids. I am an advocate for my housing community on the Resident Advisory Board working to improve the base housing experience. With the Officers’ Spouses’ Club, I served as an Executive Board member last year and currently the leader of the Anchored in Service club which organizes groups of spouses to volunteer for military affiliated organizations like the Fisher House, USO, SNCO Thrift Store, Operation Homefront, and the Navy Marine Corps Relief Society. Finally, I volunteer for multiple PTAs and as a weekly musician at multiple base chapels.

Describe how you support your community:
My time on the School Board, the Resident Advisory Board, the Camp Lejeune Leadership Seminar (CLLS) and various PTAs all stem from my passion for seeing our military children thrive, families connect, and our spouses discover and access the tools to reach their individual potential. I have used my time with spouse groups to help plan community building events and opportunities for spouses to connect. In addition to this, CLLS holds 2 seminars per year and has been one of the most impactful things that I have experienced as a military spouse. It is so fulfilling to watch spouses in 3 days go from "I'm just a…" to "I am…" statements. Changing the way that you see yourself changes the way that you move through the world. That is one of the most powerful lessons that I have seen with the sustained potential to impact the greater community.

What do you advocate for? Why?
I believe that an authentic sense of connection and community are essential for the military family. Family members, especially new spouses and older children, can find themselves feeling isolated, drowning in a sea of faces, work friends or classroom buddies, never truly making the deep connections necessary for true resilience. The strain of constant relocation, isolation, and the family/friend separation makes it even more difficult to reach out for help, mental health or otherwise, when we are not connected to others. Other issues that are at the fore are safe living conditions in military housing, the ease of finding continuity of care for EFMP members and mental health services. Long waitlists and limited availability of providers make it difficult not to have a lapse in care. I would love to see more effective preemptive support so that families don’t get to the place where more aggressive interventions and support are needed.

How have you spread the message of your platform/advocacy?
There is a running joke in my family that “mom's made a new friend again” because I will strike up a conversation with anyone willing to engage. I try to be intentional about connecting with people. For the RAB, I communicate with our housing community predominantly via social media, but also one on one, soliciting concerns and advocating for them with housing leadership and base command. With the School Board I use connections within the schools and community to stay aware of issues that affect our students and communicate with DODEA leadership to facilitate resolving those issues. With the spouse clubs and PTA/PTOs I help organize or support school and spouse events fostering community, connection and support of student achievement. Within the Camp Lejeune Leadership Seminar, I have worked as both a small group facilitator, co-MC, and other positions encouraging spouses to either start or continue developing their leadership potential in their homes and military communities.

What do you hope to accomplish with the AFI Military Spouse of the Year^® title?
I hope to use the AFI Military Spouse of the Year title to bring awareness to underrepresented areas of concern in the military community, especially those related to isolation, mental health, and the difficulties in maintaining a sense of community amid constant life transitions. Having been in leadership positions in multiple types of organizations, it is apparent that since COVID there has been a noticeable reduction in both spouse and volunteer involvement. I think that this can be directly correlated to service member retention. When spouses and families are struggling, it affects the service member. Truthfully, to live this lifestyle well, we need each other. We need the experience of those who have gone before us and the fresh perspective and energy of those who are 1st tour military spouses. Each of us has a talent that is specifically in our wheelhouse, and we must help spouses discover that and then use that, in large or small ways, to impact their homes and communities.