Stephanie Allen

Share your military spouse story:
My husband, Nick, and I have been friends since before he joined the Navy. When he completed boot camp, I was the first person he called. But as I was preparing to go off to college and he was focusing on the beginnings of his military career, a relationship that was more than friends at the time seemed unrealistic at best. Still, the "good morning" text messages, hours-long phone calls, and late-night Skype sessions persisted, and we decided to try long-distance dating. Four years later, I was graduating with my Bachelor's Degree in Communication & Media Studies, Nick was a newly-trained Preventive Medicine Technician, and our wedding was officially planned for later that year. Throughout our 11 years of marriage, my husband has been my biggest supporter. He encouraged me to pursue my Master's Degree in Organizational Leadership, which I earned in 2020. He has supported all of my ambitions from writing a novel to starting a coaching business, freelancing, volunteering and now working remotely for Military Spouse Advocacy Network. And, I am proud to have been by his side for every success along his military journey as well. Over two full-length deployments, two more shorter deployments, and countless weeks underway, we have managed to remain close as ever. We have built the most amazing life together. We have two wonderful boys, Mason and Finley, and our "first born" dog, Penny. We have experienced five PCS moves together that have taken us from top to bottom of the United States, literally! While we haven't yet been stationed overseas, we hope to one day be able to experience the OCONUS life at least once before my husband retires. The road hasn't always been easy, but there's no one else with whom I'd rather share these adventures.

Share an example of your leadership experience within the military community:
Leadership, especially within the military community, wasn't always something I envisioned for myself. Rather, my natural extroversion and willingness to commit have afforded me some wonderful opportunities to lead in this space. Due to my communications experience, I was encouraged to become the publicity officer for the Belvoir Enlisted Spouses Club, and later was voted in to the executive board as secretary for the club. At our next duty station, I became the ombudsman for the USS Carter Hall (LSD-50) during my husband's first deployment, serving as an advisor to the command FRG. After volunteering as a Navy mentor with Military Spouse Advocacy Network for some months, I was offered the role of Communications Manager for the nonprofit, and later was promoted to the Communications & Marketing Director, which I still am today. I have been so thankful for every opportunity to apply my skills, learn from others, and develop my leadership in various capacities!

Describe your involvement in the military community:
Building a village within the community is one way in which I have been able to thrive during difficult times. I have looked for ways to be involved in the military community at every duty station. I love attending command functions and assisting with bake sales, event planning, and fundraising efforts. Volunteering has been one of the best ways I've found to be involved. I have joined my local spouses' club, FRG, book clubs, and parenting groups. In 2021, I volunteered as a Navy Mentor with Military Spouse Advocacy Network (MSAN), a role in which I was able to virtually support spouses who were dealing with their first PCS, trying to balance work and motherhood, and preparing for their spouse's retirement. When I later joined the staff at MSAN, I requested that I still be allowed to work with my current mentees rather than pass them to other mentors, as we had developed a strong bond and I wanted to continue offering support to them as needed.

Describe how you support your community:
Through Military Spouse Advocacy Network, I am responsible for ensuring that spouses know about the resources and support available to them through marketing and communications efforts. Most recently, my team and I assisted with the development and launch of the Leadership Institute for Military Spouses by MSAN, home to a catalog of various free, virtual programs exclusively for military spouses around the globe. Locally, I will set up meal trains for spouses who have recently had a baby or surgery. I have offered to babysit if a spouse has no child care and needs to go to a medical appointment. When the military mission comes first, the spouses are often left to handle the household alone–I try to build a village of support that we all need in those times. Sharing these resources is so important to me because, as a new military spouse, I didn't have anyone to guide me in the right direction at the time. I try to be the support to others that I would hope to receive as well.

What do you advocate for? Why?
I advocate for strong military family units, and that comes from ensuring that we have the means to thrive in all areas, including wellness, finance, employment, and education. This lifestyle comes with uncertainty–we don't know where we will live in two years or when the next deployment will be. We often don't have family nearby. We try to be a source of stability for our children as well. We want to have careers and pursue degrees, but are often forced to set that aside due to the demands of the military. We are not alone–I have found the most incredible community of military spouses ready to drop everything to support each other where needed. I have grown a network that has access to myriad resources available to military families to help strengthen marriages, promote mental health, advocate for our children's education, and offer employment to military spouses. A strong family means a strong military. I will always advocate for families to be supported in every way.

How have you spread the message of your platform/advocacy?
As a writer, I have published work highlighting initiatives and opportunities for the military community. I have written specifically on military lifestyle for Tidewater Family Plus, At Ease (DC Military), Stars & Stripes Europe, and the MSAN blog, on topics such as deployment, veteran and spouse employment, family activities, discounts for military travel, and more. As the Communications & Marketing Director for MSAN, my responsibilities include community and outreach engagement, public relations and media. Having journalism experience has allowed me to develop relationships with the media in productive ways that are mutually beneficial and strategically sound. Along with my team, I have successfully promoted MSAN's leadership programs, resulting in greater demand and a second annual cohort added. Our efforts have also increased awareness for our Military Spouse Mentorship Program, bringing in mentors and more members to our Mentorship-HUB seeking to be paired with a mentor.

What do you hope to accomplish with the AFI Military Spouse of the Year^® title?
With the AFI Military Spouse of the Year title, I hope to establish my dedication to continue advocating for and supporting fellow military families through my voice as a writer and communications professional. Military spouses happily and selflessly share this life with our service members out of love, but that doesn't mean it comes without challenges. I have always tried to be a positive influence despite those challenges, hoping to inspire other military spouses to embrace the incredible and unique opportunities offered to us. Simply being nominated for this award is a huge honor; I am so thankful to those who have chosen to recognize me as a source of support and encouragement both personally and through my service for the military community.