Claire Copeland

Share your military spouse story:
I came somewhat late to being in an active role as a military spouse-I,myself,was active duty and an OR nurse in the Army from '00-'04; I had very little time to attend many of my husband's unit functions.I was often called into work and my schedule was unpredictable.My main focus was on taking care of the soldiers and their families in a nursing capacity.When the world changed on 9/11, I knew our lives and our service would be very different from what we initially conceived.Our focus shifted from learning how to navigate our way through a peacetime Army how to supporting one another emotionally in a war time Army.I'll never forget the heart break as I left him on the tarmac to deploy to Afghanistan the first time in '02 and I won't forget that phone call he received telling him he would be leaving for Iraq just two years later.Our love for one another and our country made it possible to weather those first two deployments.When my husband then took command of a company in May '06, I was 5 months pregnant with our son and still working as a civilian nurse at Ft Hood. My life changed drastically just 2 months later when at 7 months pregnant, my mother called to tell me my father had died very suddenly-he was only 59. The news was decidedly soul-crushing and even more so when my husband deployed a 3rd time 8 months later in '08 when our son was barely 1 year old.The loss of my father and that deployment were two pivotal life experiences that strengthened and tempered me into who I am today.I learned to never judge someone's behavior too quickly as you have no idea what losses they may have experienced.I'll forever give someone the benefit of the doubt for the same reason.I have endeavored to spend these 24 years as a military spouse showing as much compassion to soldiers and their families as possible.I always, always try to remember the love, generosity others showed me during my time of loss and I have made it my personal mission to pay that love and kindness forward

Share an example of your leadership experience within the military community:
I tend to lean more toward the "worker bee" role and I greatly prefer leading from behind and even behind the scenes. Anything too overt makes me very uncomfortable. However, I was asked a few years ago to take on the role as the program/luncheons chair for the community spouse club in Grafenwoehr, Germany. It was a joy to plan and coordinate the activities for the luncheons that year. I was able to meet wonderful people within the community and I gained so much knowledge about all the different aspects of catering and decorating for large scale events. It was also a lesson in delegation as I realized the job was just too big for one person and I needed to ask for help. The skills I garnered that year gave me the confidence to pursue further leadership roles within future spouse clubs.

Describe your involvement in the military community:
My level of involvement pales in comparison to previous nominees. I have served on the board for our local spouse club here at Fort Leonard Wood for the past 3+ years, the board for our post thrift shop, the committee for our local JROTC parents, and I have served as a Senior Spouse Advisor for my husband's brigade. I've also tried to launch an all-inclusive group for family members connected with the MP corps here at Fort Leonard Wood. I have served on spouse club boards at two other previous duty stations. I also believe my service as an active duty nurse cannot be discounted as being involved in the military community.

Describe how you support your community:
It was 1 year this past November that my son enlisted in the Missouri National Guard at 17 years old. I would be remiss if I didn't mention his willingness to serve as so many other military children do. I think in so many ways, how we raise our children is one of the key ways to building a strong community. It's important for our kids to see us support people and give to people outside our own family. He knows the value of the military spouse as well as the value of a military family member. I have also learned the best way to support my community isn't in just volunteer organizations--It's in the little things like sending texts to check up on them or remembering their birthday. I firmly believe connecting with the individuals as much as you can builds strength in the community. Being present and available is another way I have tried these past few years to show my support. Coordinating potlucks for spouses and mixers are so important because that's where you make the connections.

What do you advocate for? Why?
I don't have a specific platform or "cause" that I actively promote. I would say the most important idea I advocate for is fairness and inclusivity. This goes back to one of my core beliefs in dealing with people with compassion and grace as much as I can. Anytime I interact with my fellow military spouses and the community I want to be kind and promote kindness in everything we do. This starts at the individual level and can carry over into various volunteer organizations. It's important for fairness, inclusivity, and compassion to be at the forefront of every interaction because you never know who you may reach that day. One positive interaction with someone may change the very course of their life--you just never know.

How have you spread the message of your platform/advocacy?
Again, I don't have a media worthy platform or soap box other than I have found over the last 24 years that the single greatest thing you can be for someone is yourself. I guess you could say I try to convey a message of compassion and tolerance every time I engage with someone in our community. I have given briefings to several BOLC and CCC classes regarding manners and etiquette and the importance of kindness in their everyday interactions. I also believe in the importance of giving your time and energy wherever it is needed most.

What do you hope to accomplish with the AFI Military Spouse of the Year^® title?
I wish I had a really innovative answer to this question but I honestly think the best thing we could accomplish would be to figure out some way to really and truly connect with the spouses of our newest military members. The world is changing so quickly and I worry we are missing the mark on reaching a lot of our younger military spouses. I would love to establish some way of getting them on board and getting them excited about being a military spouse.